Random thoughts on most things from A. M. Craig.

Sunday, December 31, 2006

2007. The New and Improved.

2007 is going to be better than 2006 was. Why, you might ask? Because I've decided it will be. There are plenty of ways it can be better. I could develop a consistent sleeping pattern. I can focus on my studies more. I can follow through with creative ambitions. I can live up to what I believe. I can go to the temple more often. I can be nicer to people. I can be a LOT nicer to people. I can be more productive. I can dress better. I can spend less. I can read more. I can listen to better music. I can listen to legal music. I can communicate better. I can serve more. I can serve a WHOLE LOT more. I can be more thoughtful. I can be cleaner. I can be more organized. I can be more profitable. I can be punctual.

If you have anything else I can work on, I'm open to suggestions.

Friday, December 29, 2006


Rockets are awesome. Everybody should have a rocket. That is all.

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Review: The Prestige

Just saw "The Prestige". In short, I liked it.

Or do you want the long story? Okay then.

It is a compelling plot. It centers around two men obsessed with the craft of illusions. But after one fatal mistake, they become bitter enemies. They continue to refine their tricks, their illusions, and continually try to one up each other, not only on stage, but personally, revenge type stuff. But you could hear all of this from a normal reviewer. My main observations are...

INSPIRED CASTING of David Bowie as Nikola Tesla. Also in the mix? Andy Serkis of Lord of the Rings (Gollum) fame. Whoever thought of that deserves a raise.

One more thing. The movie presents itself as a believable story, something completely within the realm of possibility, but at the end there is an element revealed that borders on science fiction/fantasy. Its something you just kinda have to swallow if you're going to enjoy the film. But its presented so well that its not really a big problem, at least for me. Then again, I'm somebody who enjoys science fiction/fantasy. If you're not, this might be something you choke on a bit. Sorry about that.

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Dreams: Home from her mission? So early?

I dreamt the other night that i ran into a friend of mine who went on a mission a couple months ago. I asked her why she was here and not on a mission, and she responded that she had never really gone on a mission, but had stayed home because a friend of hers had broken up with her boyfriend and she (my friend) was going to try to hook up with him. I thought that was tremendously funny.

Monday, December 25, 2006

A Hole in the Pirates

If Bootstrap Bill Turner was part of the crew that stole the cursed Aztec treasure, then wouldn't he be one of the cursed undead too? How could they "strap a cannon to Bootstrap's bootstraps" and send him down to Davey Jones Locker, and have him die? I mean, I've seen the second one, I know he doesn't die, but it just doesn't make sense.

Sunday, December 24, 2006

dreams: The Wii and some chick

I beat ¨The Legend of Zelda 2: The Adventures of Link¨ on the original NES the other day. That night I dreamt I had bought the Nintendo Wii and the new zelda game. Wow, I´m a pathetic nerd, even in my dreams.

Also dreamt I was hanging out with a friends older sister, and it was wierd. I think I liked her in the dream, which is strange to contrast with reality where I don´t really. People are different in my dreams than they are in waking life, and I would say that I am frequently different too, but then somebody would suggest that my dream-self might be a manifestation of a ¨real¨ me that doesn´t often show its face.

Monday, December 11, 2006

Lost in the Mansion

Dreamt I was in a huge house/mansion/possibly a boarding school, I'm not sure. It was big enough that there were disused parts of the building. I was hiding, and i Think I didn't want to go outside for elemental reasons, i.e. rain or snow.

Dreamt a couple nights ago I was working on a school project with a girl in one of my classes, and when we were done, she just wanted to hang out. I was not interested, and woke up instead.

Friday, December 08, 2006


I've decided I dream more than a lot of people do, or at least I remember them more. So I'm going to start blogging about it all.

Last night I dreamt I was a special ops assassin, and while on a mission, some guy saved my life. So after this all, he thought he might be able to get a favor out of the organization that I worked for. He talked to my Bosses, on tall guy who was just above me in the hierarchy, who had dark hair and a mustache and dark hair who had also been an assassin, and some guy who was above him, who wore a suit, who was just the business end of things.

Not only did they not want to do his favor, but they told him he needed to do something for us, and if he didn't do it, they would have him killed and feed his body to pigs. They told him this in the presence of a very large pig.

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

I was cheated

I feel I was robbed in my public education experience. They taught me about math. They never taught me about credit cards. They taught me about government. They never taught me how to pay taxes. They taught me about probability. They never taught me about handling insurance. I don't think these subjects were even available at my school. They should have been mandatory.

Am I just supposed to magically know these things now that I am an "adult"? Does one learn this through osmosis? I was robbed, and I hold THE MAN responsible.

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

33 min.

had a dream last night. Dreamt that I was in hotel that somehow became entirely flooded to the point that it was submerged, all the way under water. Also, a bunch of animals somehow became zombie animals, and were trying to eat my brains. And my family was made up of a bunch of people who aren't really my family (I think there was an old black woman who was strangely my grandma). and we locked ourselves in a room and tried to keep a zombie elephant out. Then we turned on the TV, only the TV was more like a computer, and we went to a site that had a bunch of dumb funny videos, like homestarrunner.com, and they had a 33 min. long documentary video I had made about my experience trying to survive in the submerged hotel with my family and a whole bunch of zombie animals trying to eat our brains. They had in parenthases below the link to watch the video that "This video really should be up to 33 min. shorter" which was a jab at me becasue the video was only 33 min. long. They had posted it becasue it was funny how bad the documentay was, like that "Aisha" viral video, wasn't meant to be funny, but just was. We watched this video while I was trying to make the documentary itself. Also on the site they had a feature where one of two animated bannannas or a fried oreo would sing you a song about the days trading on one of three stock exchanges.
My roommate Landon thinks it means I'm on drugs. My dear friend Dave thinks it means I have too much on my plate in life right now. I tend to agree with the latter opinion.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Oh, and serendipity

Incidentally, I had an interesting experience today. I sat down to eat lunch by myself, in a pod of other guys in the Cougereat who were eating by themselves. I was wearing my black leather jacket and my black Duncan hat that makes me look like a director, like Ron Howard or Michael Moore or Steven Spielberg. I was there for only a few minutes, when some guy asks if he can sit at the same table. "Take a seat" says I. After a couple minutes of silence, he asks what I am reading. " A Film textbook. I have the class in a little bit." And guess what? Turns out he is Gideon Burton, whom my LDS Cinema teacher has mentioned several times. It was really cool, I told him I was in that class, and he asked me what my final paper would be about. LDS Cinema as an ethnic Genre, and he went into how he was in Ireland this summer studying Irish ethnic Cinema. It was great, he gave me a bunch of good ideas for sources and how to refine my subject and what things I could explore. He is working with my teacher on a special issue of the Association for Mormon Letters that will focus on LDS film.
How cool is that? I totally think it was the hat that got his attention.

and where does the time go?

So I haven't posted on here in forever. Sorry about that. I've been extremely busy. That thing my friends and I started a while back? It's really doing well, better then my pessimistic self expected. We have a new and vastly improved website that is destined to only get better. I might be on TV tomorrow, a friend who runs this local cable talkshow wants us to come on. Cool, huh? I have a ton of reading to do for my classes, thats not new but still important. I have plenty to do for my church calling. Oh, and I am dating somebody. Lets all be honest, if you ask me, thats the real highlight here.
Life is good.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Yes, but who monitors the quality control people?

It has become patently obvious that though I try to use various vocabulary in my blogging, that I can't spell worth a hoot. I don't know if I will ever be whole without my constant crutch, spellcheck.

Also, I need to write a story for my Creative Writing class. I think I will use the "Xenophobia" entry as my basis.

Pertaining to my creative writing class, there is one problem there that stands out above any others. There is the constant difficulty of being among a group who think they may be really good at something (writing, in this case)and knowing that you fit right in.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

half so much

I find myself wanting to write what I think and feel, but I also think and feel that would be very unwise. Why, you ask? Because what do people think and feel about? Things that are important to them, issues in their life, people they care about, or worse, people they don't care for at all. Everything else is superfluous, really, isn't it? I could get on here and talk about how cool I think robots are, or how much I don't care about sports, but does that make one iota of difference in my life? In yours? No, in case it wasn't clear. It doesn't.

What could I write about, whats on my mind? I could talk about my friends, past and present, changed and persisted. I could publish all my gripes about my roommates, but who reads this? Hi guys, ya, I'm talking about you. I could write all the things that I admire about them too, there are many virtues in the bunch. I could talk about people I genuinely dislike, but what good would that do anybody? Least of all me, to indulge in grudging feelings. Who am I helping by practicing the subtle craft of mental justification for unChrist like feelings?

I could talk about my family, the different dynamics between me and each of my siblings, or feelings about my parents. Hi everybody, talking about you too. But guess what? No matter what I say, positive or negative, honest or unjust, real or imagined, it would all be awkward and illrecieved. It would strain tender relationships (all relationships are tender) and nobody would know what to do with it. Don't be fooled, nobody wants real honesty. Ask P.T. Barnum, people want to be fooled, its pacifying.

The truth is, to quote one of my favorite hobbits, I don't know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve. And more than that even. If people knew half the things I thought about them at various times, I imagine their opinion of me would be rather different. Things from top to bottom, things like "You are beautiful" or "You're a complete idiot", or maybe the obvious contrast, "I love you" vs. "I hate you".

This, by the way, is why people often publish their blogs anonymously. Even this level of honesty has a way of making people squint with a funny sensation at the back of their head, thinking it not quite right that somebody should just come out and say things like that. If its anonymous, you can say it all and not have to own up to anything. Nobody gets hurt, nobody has to deal with it.

So just think, next time I'm talking to you, what am I really thinking? I'm not going to say it, you wouldn't like it either way. We'll just keep at it with small talk on irrelevant issues. Just know that you don't see half so much as is really there, because I try to show less than half so much as I really think and feel.

Tuesday, January 31, 2006


I just had an interesting, comical experience that proves better than any fiction I could concoct at the moment.
I sat in my Intro to Film class next to my friend Josh and set in to listen to the lecture and enjoy the class as I always do. A shorter, darker kid sat next to me. Josh on my left, this kid on my right. The days lecture was on foreign film.
It became appearant very shortly into the class that this individual to my right had no sense of personal space. He repeatedly bumped me. With his knee, foot, elbow, arm, and seemingly anything else that can project from ones person. It was rather uncomfotable. I have what you might call a comfort "bubble", its a personal problem, I know, but the reality remains. I kept thinking, "Doesn't it bother this kid to bump me? For every action there is an equel and opposite reaction, he is feeling a bump as surly as I am every time he makes contact. I'm trying to focus, to take notes, isn't he trying to do the same thing? And doesn't all of this contact bother him as well?"

No, it seemed. No it didn't.

Two days ago, in a church leadership training meeting, I heard a talk about charity that reminded me how very uncharitable I am. Truly, I am grossly lacking in this virtue. I kept reminding myself of this, and that I should try to be charitable, give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe hes from a different country, and is not familiar with the American notion of personal space. He probably is from another country, I thought. He looks it, he sounds like it, and heaven knows he smells like it.

He won't stop moving his leg. Moving ones leg is normal when sitting down, it helps with circulation. But Don't do it when your knee is in full contact with the person next to you. And what is he drawing? It looks like something a third-grader would do.

The teacher continued the lecture with no notice of us.
"One of the greatest obstacles to appreciating foreign film is 'Xenophobia'. Does anybody know what Xenophobia is?"
"Fear of things that are different?"
"Yes, only not just fear, but hatred."

Man, would there be no end to this kid? I had my leg up rested on the knee of the other, clearly on my side of the arm rest, the unspoken dividing line in theater seating. Lines are no barrier for this kid, though, none whatever. He lifted his leg up to do the same thing as me, only mirrored. His knee bumped mine out of the way to take the space I had previously occupied.

"And as a wise man said, a barrier is not where a thing ends, but where something else begins."

Class break. Finally. I get up to get a drink, come back and sit down. "Josh", I says, "this kid next to me will not stop bumping me. If I am leaning your way, I'm sorry, but I'm trying to put some distance between me and the guy to my right."
"No, don't worry about it, I noticed he was kinda' spread out, too."

End break, and class begins again. Only no bumping boy!

"Maybe you got lucky" says Josh. "Your friend doesn't seem to be here."

But no such luck. A little bit into the class, he comes walking back with a bag of chips and a smoothie. We were sitting right in the front of the class, in the very middle. The instructor was standing immediately in front of us, and little bumper had to walk in front of him to get to where we were.

The teacher was mid sentance when bumper boy made his prime assault on my space. The (full) smoothie slipped from bumber boys hands as he tried to pick up his folder, and Pink Aloha Pinapple purree escaped from the broken styrofoam cup, gushing out onto the ground just in front of me. The teacher stopped talking for a moment, and then began again.

My shoes bore the scars of this attack, pink splotches all over them. For those of you who are not aware, I rather enjoy my shoes, I like thier shape, color, and overall departure from the rest of the clothes we wear. Its not a fetish thing, there is nothing strange or unhealthy about it. I just like my shoes. I like them clean. Which they no longer were.

I was wearing my Pumas, the pair that have an outer gray mesh, an interweaving latice of threads. That turns out to be a rather porous surface, and readily absorbed the pink contaminant.

This, you would think, should set me off. This, you would think, would send me into a tyrade. But no, not this time. Maybe there were some mental gymnastics going on behind my consciousness that did it, but somehow all this didn't even bother me. It was funny, really. I couldn't come up with this kind of scenario if I tried. It was comical.

Bumper boy did quickly appologize, not profusely, but an apology none the less. He didn't make any attempts to clean it up, either. There was a pool of pink slush that grew as it melted throughout the remainder of class.
Nor did he stop bumping. Strangely, and seemingly with no provocation, he turned and asked where I was from. "Phoenix Arizona." I replied. "You?"

"I am from the Himalayas. Nepal is my country."

For the rest of class we watched a handful of clips from various foreign films. But I correct myself, the teacher said we shouldn't call them that.

"The term 'Foreign' Film focuses on what is different about this genre, it focuses on what we tend to be afraid of. Rather, we will call them 'International' Films. This helps us focus on what is similar. Its not that we speak different languages thats important, but that we both use language."

Sunday, January 29, 2006


Sometimes we pretend not to know people.
And by "we" I mean I, and by " sometimes" I mean all the time.
The other day I saw three girls that I know, or rather have known, that I pretended not to know. There are two reasons for this. I don't think they would remember me, and theres really nothing to say. Examples (all from Wednesday)...
1. Saw the former Sister Miller at the DMV when I updated my registration. She was a missionary in the Spokane Mission at the same time as I was. She was one of the first people to greet and welcome me on my first day in the mission. She welcomed us with truly comical enthusiasm. "I JUST LOVE IT WHEN THE NEW MISSIONARIES COME!!!" I found out later that she had only been out six weeks at that point and we were the first group of new missionaries that she had encountered. She is now married and I've seen her there before at the DMV when I registered the car the first time. She was the teller that helped me when I was there last week. Both of the above cited reasons applied.
2. There was another girl there who I recognized from my freshman year. Random event it was, she needed somebody to do some illustrations when I was living in DT first term here, and somebody told her that they had a friend (me) that liked to draw. So this random girl payed me to draw some pictures. It took longer that I thought and it really wasn't worth it, but she was desperate to get help on her project. I don't remember her name other than it was unusual. I think she might have recognized me actually, despite having only really talked once four and one half years ago. But there was nothing to say to her, so I didn't.
3. Also freshman year, first term, I went to Teriaki Stix in the WILK every day for lunch. I may have already talked about this. Anyway, long story short the girl who worked there gave me her number and I never called her. Now she sits behind me in my Pop Culture class. Best to feign ignorance there I think.

Am I a bad person for this? I think I might be.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

OOOOhhhh...moving pictures.

I recently reflected on how much I watch movies. I watch a lot. Monday I watched Whats Eating Gilbert Grape. Not a bad movie, but didn't prove to be one that I really want to see again. There were certainly some interesting subjects and themes, but I don't really know what the film was trying to say.

-It dealt with the subject of food. He works at a grocery store, his name is grape, his mother is obese. But what it all means, I'm not sure of. Help and input here would be appreciated.

-It dealt with faithfulness. He was involved in an affair with a customer at the store. The married woman he is involved with then becomes jealous when he meets a younger, more attractive, and all around better woman. He had to go to his hometown grocery's competitor when he needs something near the end of the movie, and his boss saw him, saw his unfaithfulness.

-It deals with the nature of small town America, and its slow painful decline. There were little things here and there that gave the not-so-subtle message. Arnie (played by Leonardo DiCaprio, stunning performance) says to Gilbert repeatedly in several situations, "We're not going anywhere", not at all referring to their station in life, but thats the deeper message. The man that tries to sell Gilbert insurance (not knowing that Gilbert is the man his wife is cheating with) tells him, "You've got no auto insurance, no fire insurance, no life." Note how he didn't say life insurance. That is implied, but the message, again, is that of not moving, not going anywhere, not having a life or purpose. If Gilbert has any purpose, so far it hasn't proven to be for himself, but for others. For right or wrong, he meets the needs/wants of others; an aging housewife looking for young love, a mother who can't do mothering things anymore, a brother who doesn't know how to take care of himself (or anything else), or a grocery store owner who fears the future. He tries to give all these people what it seems they need.

Anyway, I've gone on long enough. Long review short, didn't like the affair, loved Arnie, thought the themes were interesting but ambiguous.

Tuesday I watched three, count them, three silent films from the twenties. That wasn't so much because I wanted to, but because thats what we were learning about in both of my film classes.

Last night, Wednesday, I watched Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. The review on that one is short. Entertaining but campy. Its just a mindless fun time. You can't really think too much about movies like that.

Tonight a bunch of us are going to the LDS Film Festival, of which we are a part. Have I mentioned that yet? Last weekend we decided to enter the 24-hour Film Making Marathon. I really really don't like what we submitted. If we had more time we could have done much better, but I guess thats the game with a 24-hour film making marathon.

Is this much movie-going healthy? Regardless, I am hoping to get tickets to go to Sundance next weekend or one of the satellite festivals.

Friday, January 13, 2006

on the shoulders of Giants

Yesterday I went to a...devtional? It wasn't really the normal BYU Tuesday devotional, but it was the same kind of setting. Regardless of the title you give it, Truman G. Madsen was the keynote speaker. I am a big fan. There is a question that I have wanted to ask him for years, ever since listening to his lectures on the Prophet Joseph Smith. I thought there would never be a better opportunity to ask, so I went up afterwards and asked. He was shaking hands of various students that had come up to meet him for one reason or another. He came to me, said hello, thank you, shook my hand, and looked like he was ready to move on, but I hadn't asked my question yet, so I just started before he could leave. I hadn't even gotten to the question yet when he stopped me, said "I know where you are going with this, I get that question all the time. I didn't realize it would be such an issue when I first spoke about that, but I now have a form letter to answer it. Give me your address and I'll send it to you."
However, Everybody else there was so intrugued as to what the question was that he just repeated it and gave the answer on the spot.
Here is the letter he sent me.

Dear Austin:

Thanks for your encouragement.
Here is the rest of the story.

in Truman G. Madsen's, Joseph Smith, the Prophet, Bookcraft, 1989.

There was a beautiful moment when Dimick Huntington in a shoe shop was working on the Prophet's boots. The Prophet recounted things Dimick had done for him, mostly physical and comforting things—rowing the boat across the Mississippi until his hands were blistered, carrying messages, and as the scriptures have it, "hewing wood and drawing water." The Prophet expressed gratitude and finally said to Dimick, "Ask of me what you will, and it shall be given you, even if it be to the half of my kingdom." Dimick did not want to impoverish the Prophet. He asked something else. "Joseph," he said with his whole soul, "Joseph, I desire that where you and your father's house are [meaning in eternity] there I and my father's house may be also." The Prophet put his head down for a moment as if in meditation, and then looked up. "Dimick, in the name of Jesus Christ, it shall be even as you ask."3'

The father [should be brother as well as father] of Dimick was named William. One night the Prophet learned from Shadrack Roundy, who stood guard at his gate, that a mob was on the river. Shadrack Roundy's "rascal beater," which we would call a billy club, would not be enough against twenty men. The Prophet went down the street to William's house, woke him up, and said, "A mob is coming, counsel me." William said: "I know what to do. You climb in my bed. I'll go back and get in yours." That is what they did.
The mob came and dragged William out. Down by the river they discovered they had the wrong man. Their viciousness knew no bounds. In wrath, they "stripped him, roughed him up, tarred and feathered him, and herded him back into Nauvoo like a mad dog."32 When he finally staggered into his own home the Prophet embraced him and said with all the power of his soul, "Brother William, in the name of the Lord I promise you will never taste of death." That prophecy was fulfilled.33

p. 148 Notes and Sources to Chapter Three
32. "Brother Joseph," said William, "you were right to come. You get in my bed and don't you worry. The Lord will protect you." In the light of dawn the mob saw their mistake."When Brother Joseph saw what they had done [to William] he clasped him in his arms and said, 'Brother William, in the name of the Lord I promise you will never taste of death.' " (See Diary of Oliver B. Huntington, p. 9.)

33. William Huntington went west with the exodus and settled eventually in Springville, Utah. One night; forty-three years after the Nauvoo incident, just after going to bed he was conversing with his wife in the darkness. He said something and she replied. She said something and he did not reply. After two or three repetitions she lighted a lamp. Without a sigh or a shudder he had died. The family believed this was the fulfillment of Joseph's promise, which is universalized in the Doctrine and Covenants: "And it shall come to pass that those that die in me shall not taste of death, for it shall be sweet unto them; and they that die not in me, wo unto them, for their death is bitter" (D&C 42:46-47). See Diary of Oliver B. Huntington, vol. 2, p. 271, entry of March 19, 1887.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

The Lists Begin

During the last three months of my mission, I carried a little notebook with me at all times with a very special purpose. It was a place to record things that had little or nothing to do with my day to day prosolyting efforts, but I wanted to remember all the same. It ended up being mostly lists, some of things for right after my mission, some of things for before I die. It became more fantastic as time passed. I hoped to post a picture of the list itself, but that will probably come later, seeing as my computer and scanner aren't getting along these days. If there was any confusion previously about how very wierd I actually am, this will clear it all up. So, without further adue, here is the first of a series of lists.

Stuff I want to Make When I get Home:
-Rubik's cube
-Butterfly knife
-Expando sphere
-Spinning top
-Magic rings
-Jitter rings
-both of the things on page ten
-a "director's cut" version of Finding Faith in Christ, w/ commentary, special features, etc.
-Beam robots
-A website on how to make simple toys(yo-yo's, tops) from parts at an auto store

I am so lame.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Book of Mormon update

I got a response from the proffessor that I emailed about the first edition Book of Mormon. Here is what he said.

Dear Austin,
The people to ask would be a couple of BYU librarians. Their names are David_Whittaker@byu.edu or Larry_Draper@byu.edu. They both have quite a bit of expertise in rare Mormon books and could give you an estimate as to it's worth. The last that I heard of one selling that was in good condition was about $50,000. They have really shot up in price over the last 15 years because LDS businessmen have been buying them up for their kids and grandkids. I heard that there were about 200-300 copies in existence today.

Parenthetically, I have been watching for a copy here for use in Religious Education. I would not mind buying one and then keeping it here so that many BYU BoM students could see and even touch it. It has occurred to me that the concept of witnesses in the scriptures is best outlined in the experiences of the three and the eight witnesses to the BoM, specifically the notion of "seeing, feeling and hearing" the witness. Anyway, tell your friends that they shouldn't touch the pages without having protective cloth gloves on and that it's humidity should be keep fairly constant. (They probably know those things already.)
Well, I hope this will help answer your questions. Keep me posted if they are the slightest bit interested in getting it into a safer environment where many more could have a chance to experience it and be impacted.

My Best,
Br. Wilson

I love BYU. Love it.